Navigating a divorce can be dark, scary, and devastating, but there is light on the other side. Ending a marriage often brings new opportunities to reconnect with a part of yourself that you lost and explore new parts of yourself. Read on for some advice on positively navigating your divorce and finding inner peace in the process.
Go on Trips and Get Involved with Meaningful Events and Activities
● Enlist the help of a professional therapist to be your rudder as you navigate through your divorce.
● Select one “trusted confidant.” Ideally, this should be a friend or associate who had a divorce of their own, yet landed in a good place, leads a life today that is admirable, has a working relationship with their former spouse, and their children are healthy.
● Get some events/activities/trips on the calendar that are meaningful to YOU (specifically you and not your children). Having something in the future to look forward to is great for maintaining positivity during down cycles. These can range from more elaborate activities such as a cruise or trip to Europe, or something less expensive on your domestic bucket list such as a white-water rafting trip.
● Select something you have always wanted to learn or do and sign up. Something that you can look forward to week in and week out such as a book club, cooking course, or tennis lessons.
Maintaining positivity during a disruptive life challenge such as a divorce is not easy. It is typically insufficient to use only words or a pep talk from a friend to help. Taking action steps like those mentioned above can help maintain some positivity until the divorce is officially in the rearview mirror.
Susanne M. Alexander is a Relationship and Marriage Educator, Coach, Character Specialist, and author with her company, Marriage Transformation.
Link to Your Artistic Side
One of the best ways to re-balance after a divorce is to link to your artistic side. The options are numerous:
These types of connections tap deep into the heart and soul, bring healing, and uplift the mood. They are good ways to clear out the bad vibrations in the self and find new joy.
Tara Eisenhard, Divorce Coach, Mediator at Tara Eisenhard.
Set Long-term Goals
One tip I have for staying positive after a divorce is to set long-term goals. This gives you a purpose and something to look forward to. It also opens the opportunity to celebrate smaller milestones along the way, which feels good and reminds you of the progress you’re making.
As for reconnecting with yourself, it can be helpful to reconnect with old friends or old hobbies. Old friends can help you remember good times prior to marriage and help you get back in touch with another part of yourself. [If] you used to write poetry or paint a lot more before the marriage, the divorce can be an opportunity to get back into that zone and tap into your talents.
Alejandro Uriarte, Personal Injury Attorney at 1-800 Injured.
During the course of your relationship, you likely developed a comfortable routine. You engaged in similar pursuits over a period of time with the same set of people. You may have appreciated this routine because it felt routine and secure. However, as the saying goes, life occurs outside your comfort zone.
Challenge yourself as part of your quest to rediscover yourself. You are not required to take any actions that you would deem insane (unless you want to), but stepping outside of your comfort zone will broaden your horizons.
Furthermore, personal suffering helps you understand more about yourself and your ideals. You can develop a passion for a new hobby. You could also decide that skydiving is not for you. You will have learned and developed from the experience regardless of the outcome.
Before moving forward, I believe it is sometimes necessary to take a few detours down Memory Lane. If it’s not too painful, consider your relationship’s beginning. Consider who you were before your connection with your ex. Now is an excellent moment to reconnect with old pals you haven’t seen in years. Share some recollections and laughter. Allow others to remind you of who you have been and who you may be in the future. If it feels right, dig further deeper.
Give Yourself Time to Grieve, Lean On Your Friends and Family
1. Give yourself time to grieve.
It’s important to give yourself time to grieve the loss of your marriage. Allow yourself to feel the pain and sorrow that comes with the end of a relationship. Cry if you need to, but try not to dwell on the negative.
2. Don’t be afraid to lean on your friends and family.
Your friends and family can be a great source of support during this difficult time. Lean on them for emotional and practical support. They can help you through the tough times and celebrate the good times.
3. Take care of yourself.
Divorce can be tough on your body and mind. Be sure to take care of yourself by eating right, exercising, and getting enough sleep. Taking care of yourself will help you feel better mentally and physically.
4. Reconnect with your hobbies and interests.
One of the best ways to stay positive after a divorce is to reconnect with the things you love to do. Whether it’s painting, hiking, reading, or anything else, doing the things you enjoy will help you feel good about yourself.
5. Seek professional help if you need it.
If you’re struggling to cope with your divorce, don’t hesitate to seek professional help. A therapist can help you work through your emotions and give you tools to deal with the challenges of divorce.
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*This article is for informational purposes only and is not intended to provide legal advice. If you require legal advice, please contact a licensed attorney in your local area.